The Pickle has been enjoying his time without his brother these school days – he’s allowed more free reign of toys and the house, and generally gets more attention. However, a few days ago he even refused that. The Mother of the Pickle walked out from yet another house-cleaning duty to find the Pickle closing the door to his room.
“Bye bye, momma. Pipple ‘lone time, k?” (Yes, he calls himself ‘Pipple’) The MOTP was so surprised, and preoccupied with keeping the rest of the house clean despite three boys, that she didn’t pay much attention to it and went back to securing the disaster area. After a few minutes, however, she became curious. She knocked on the door to his room, and slowly opened the door. The Pickle sat down heavily, as if he had just been running from the other side of the room.
“Hi momma. Pipple ‘lone time! Go way! Pipple ‘lone time!” The Mother of the Pickle nodded, and closed the door, satisfied he wasn’t sacrificing goats, rubbing pomegranate juice into the carpet, or anything equally as heinous. She departed again for a few minutes, and then decided check on him again, but not to knock this time. The door opened to: The Great Cadbury Massacre.
The Pickle sat in the middle of his room, his father’s 12oz package of Cadbury Mini-Eggs sitting in front of him, multi-colored drool soaking the front of his shirt.
“Hmmf Mmmmma! Pple lne tme! PPLE LNE TME!”
The sad thing is that we know he got WAY too many because he didn’t even cry when the MOTP took the eggs away. He just said:
“Bye bye treats!”
The Pickle has come to the conclusion that if you can’t see his tantrum, it’s not worth screaming about. For instance, the Mother of the Pickle just tried to get him dressed. While the Pickle has decided he will tolerate clothes, he has also decided that he will NOT tolerate changing these clothes. This makes putting him to bed or getting him ready to leave a surprisingly loud task.
So the MOTP de-pantsed the Pickle, triggering his Fight or Tantrum response, to which the Pickle immediately began screaming. Hilariously, however, during this screaming the Pickle began looking around very carefully. Still in full scream mode, he walked over to a clear spot on the living room floor and sat down. He very carefully decreased to ‘high-whine’ mode and laid down very gently, rolling over on his back. Finally fully on the ground, the Pickle turned it back up to full-on tantrum mode and began screaming and kicking again.
While the MOTP was laughing about this, she was also doing her daily juggle satiating the whims of the Gremlin – a full time job in its own right. So she left the screaming Pickle to attempt to kick a hole through the floor, in order to locate the always elusive HOMEWORK OF WEEKS PAST. Unfortunately, her departure did not sit well with the Pickle, who decided he needed to get up, run over to the MOTP, grab her hand, drag her back to the living room, and then proceeded to lay down and tantrum.
It’s a very loud, but rather entertaining process
It’s hard to not wake up laughing when you hear the Gremlin shouting
“NO PICKLES! Yes, I know I have an adorable rumpus, but that doesn’t mean you can touch it!”
(The Gremlin does not close the door after himself when he goes to the bathroom, and fully drops trou regardless. The Pickle believes this is an invitation to poke the Gremlin in his exposed butt.)